Arranged Marriages

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What Are Arranged Marriages?

Arranged marriages are marriages in which parents, using the help of community elders, matchmakers, or religious leaders, choose their son’s or daughter’s future spouse in order for their children to have a “happy” and “successful” life. These marriages are completely opposite to love marriages, where one picks their spouse by choice. Arranged marriages cover a wide diversity of procedures, cultural customs, length of engagement, as well as the obvious and spiritual reasons for the matching of the partners. Although they are done without permission, arranged marriages usually result in long-lasting relationships.

In What Countries Are They Practiced?

·       India

·       Japan

·       China

·       Pakistan

·       Israel

What Major Factors Should Be Taken Into Account When Looking For a Spouse?

·       Reputation- must have a good reputation

·       Wealth- the wealthier, the better

·       Appearance- usually look at the skin color and height

·       Values- generous and has manners

·       Religion- have the same religion

·       Horoscope- must match with the spouse

·       Medical- must have no disease and should not be physically handicapped

Child Marriages

Out of the many types of arranged marriages (exchanged, diplomatic, introduction, love-cum) child marriages are the most well-known ones. The parents of a small child (even infants) arrange an upcoming wedding with another youngster's parents. Both children usually do not come to a certain age where they know what marriage even is. They only listen to their parents, thinking it is some sort of game. In some cultures, the age is at or even before the onset of puberty. At points in time, little baby girls have been married to older men, but they move in with their husbands around five or six year old. Many people who have been married in this way do grow to love and appreciate their spouses after the marriage. Although these types of marriages are illegal, they still do happen in certain parts of the world.

Past V.S. Now

Arranged marriages in the past and present are very different. In a traditional marriage, the parents, like normal, choose their child’s better half with very little consent from the kids. If either one of the son or daughter refuses the match, the parents would severely punish, or sometimes, even kill the child. Most of the time, the child’s objection is ignored and the two families proceed with the marriage. Luckily, in modern arranged marriages, parents do still choose the spouse for their daughter or son but only with the child’s permission. If the child decides to postpone marriage, the parents listen to them and put no pressure. Indian people nowadays also have the option of love marriage. No more do parents force their children to be in a relationship chosen by them.

 “Arranged marriages are still pretty common in these parts (and now I come to think of it, what other kinds are there? It's not as if the boy and the girl and all their relatives and a new dress and the priest of choice and a slap-up knife-and-fork tea for forty all turn up in one place by accident, is it?).

                                                                                                     -Gytha Ogg